The Rembis Report and Other Fascinating Topics - Volume CXIV

ICYMI means In Case You Missed It.

I only learned that because I received an email with the tag line ICYMI and was not sure what it was. Once I found out what it meant I realized that what I clicked was not spam, just something I did not hear about. Something I had, indeed, missed.

But that in itself was kind of annoying. It was patronizing. It assumed that what I missed was important enough that I should not miss it, and the thing is, it was not even interesting. Or entertaining. It was clickbait. More or less, something I could have missed altogether that never would have made a difference whether I knew it or not. In fact, now that I think about it, I can’t even recall what it was. The only thing that stood out from that email was the acronym, ICYMI, which at the time, I did not even know meant In Case You Missed It. I had to Google ICYMI to find that out.

ICYMI means vastly different things to different people. Those using the acronym are imploring viewers to scrutinize whatever they want people to look at whether it pertains to them or not. It is an advertising gimmick, plain and simple. Those on the receiving end of messages stating ICYMI are then left wondering if they truly did miss something. Is it important enough to warrant such a bold statement? Is the utterance of this phrase really necessary?

Probably not. It merely states that either

A): You were told this already and you were not paying attention, so here is that message again, pay attention now, so we can drive it into your skull, and you can send us money, or

B): You were never properly made aware of this, and chances are that this will indeed, be the first time you have heard this message, but it is being broadcast as if you should have heard it already, so pay attention right now, and send us money.

You may notice that in either case the message is ultimately the same. Because ICYMI messages come from marketing bots who do not care if they are bothering you. They are not people at all. They represent people who do not care about you and just want your money, or your signature on a petition, plus money. It is more about what you can do for them than what they are offering to do for you.

But when an ICYMI message comes from a trusted source, such as myself, that’s a little different. I like to think I offer some entertainment value and have something important to share. When I mention anyone in need I consider my referrals to be worthy causes.

I know that I watch more TV than the average person, so I would not be surprised if you may not have heard about a couple of the shows I am about to mention. As you know, when I latch onto a program I like, I watch all of it from beginning to end. The same goes for actors, directors, cinematographers, and musicians. When I dig something, I try to absorb the entire body of work. I can’t help shouting about the stuff that I really like, so today I am here to tell you about some programs I recommend checking out. Just in case you missed it.

Moving Art by Louie Schwartzberg. This spectacular series just left Netflix. It is an absolute marvel produced by visionary cinematographer Louie Schwartzberg, who has basically perfected time lapse and drone photography. Sometimes teaming up with wildlife photographer Alex Falk and underwater photographer Howard Hall, these 19 episodes take you on a peaceful journey around the globe. Schwartzberg’s view of the natural world pairs perfectly with calm instrumental music selections, for a look at the wonders of the planet devoid of commentary. Just stare and absorb without interruption. You don’t have to think about it to enjoy it. Just watch it. There is no story. It’s just pictures and music. A perfect backdrop for any occasion. Something you would find gracing the screens of a nice lounge. I am particularly smitten with the New Zealand episode.

Another documentarian worth watching is Jon Kasbe. His cinematography takes you on personal human journeys. I first saw his work on the Hulu series, The Deep End, an in-depth exposé on self-help guru Teal Swan. I first heard of her teachings on YouTube, so when I came across Kasbe’s docuseries, I checked it out. He gets up close with his subjects, sometimes filming truly personal moments and keeps the camera rolling no matter how uncomfortable anyone is. But besides that, his camera work is spectacular. He focuses on things that most directors don’t consider, peeling wallpaper, kick-knacks on tables, or insects on walls. This particular series has received critical flak, and been accused of staging scenes, but I found the footage convincing.

Seeing this series led me to his feature documentary When Lambs Become Lions. The story chronicles the story of African poachers and wildlife officers sworn to protect the animals they seek. He rides along everyone to get multiple viewpoints and captures the emotions and the dangers involved for both the lawmen and those who can sell animal parts for big money. The film played at many festivals and won awards at Tribeca and Telluride.

I am looking forward to Kasbe’s latest creation, Sophia, about the most advanced and humanoid robot there is. Sophia is recognized as an independent thinking artificial intelligence who has sung on TV with Jimmy Fallon and was granted citizenship by the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia.

So ICYMI, that’s my most recent short list of stuff to catch.

Okay Mike, but what if we didn’t miss it? What if we knew about it all along?

That’s what the IC is for, smart guy. Since you’re asking, here’s another short list of updates ICYMI.

This just in:

Donald Trump is clobbering Ron DeSantis in the polls. Just three weeks ago, I reported that Donye had a 34 point lead over RonDo, before the first Republican debate. That lead has expanded to 46 points among Republicans, and among voters nationwide, Trump is neck and neck with Joe Biden in the latest popularity contest.

On June 30th, Georgey Boy Santos was indicted for wire fraud, money laundering, theft of public funds, and lying to the House of Representatives. His aunt and his father bailed him out to the tune of $500,000. I told you all about his travails in my six-part series, Russian Nesting Dolls, Gremlins, and Tribbles. His next court date is Thursday, September 7th, and he is facing up to 20 years in prison.

The citizens of Maui are still having a tough time recuperating after those devastating wildfires. Please check out this message from The Rock and help if you can.

Finally, let’s take a minute to think about how great the world around us really is and how we may be inspired to do something great. Daydream with me.

You know, we get all this news from all over, these documentaries about stuff that happens in all kind of places we have never been, people doing things we find difficult to fathom, and what we get from our TV screens is really a fantastic ride. We are lucky that we get to witness what we do without any of the danger. In case we miss something, there are reporters out there, bringing it to us.

I have heard people say that they don’t watch the news, like it is a badge of honor or something. I think that is just ignorant. I know you can’t see everything, but everyone should take the time to learn something. It is just as frustrating when I hear somebody say they have never watched a Star Wars movie. When I hear that it makes me feel like an Ewok just died.

I sometimes daydream about owning my own bar. Lots of people do. My bar would only serve top shelf liquors, fine wines, and carefully procured beers. Only stuff I personally like. It would be expensive, too, to keep out the riff-raff. I wouldn’t serve food and I wouldn’t allow smoking because I don’t want crumbs and grease all over the place and I despise tobacco. I would only have music without words so that nobody felt inclined to sing along. That’s right, no karaoke, and no jukebox. If my bar had a TV, I would run stuff like Moving Art on it non-stop. No dialogue. No commercials. No news. Hey, we all need a haven.

It would be the perfect lounge. A place to drink and do little else. Nothing to mess with your imbibement. No games. No pool tables or pinball machines. You can bring in crossword puzzles or a deck of cards if you like. The walls would be constructed with aluminum wire to create a Faraday cage that destroys all radio and microwave signals. Forget about using your cell phone. Nobody wants to hear your conversations or watch you scrolling through texts. That’s annoying. Just relax and drink your drinks.

The décor would be devoid of signage except for the liquor license and the gentlemen’s and ladies’ lavatories. No crazy neon exclamations or calendars. The rooms would have soft, colored, up-lighting to eliminate shadows, and not burn your retinas. The furniture would be padded chairs and leather sofas for maximum comfort.

My unique design would ensure that there wouldn’t be too many customers either so you could always get a seat. Barely anybody to bother you when you are trying to drink. That’s right. It would be total heaven.

Cash only with no ATM. Go to the bank on your own time. And while you are at it, find a worthy cause to support that has nothing to do with politics.

Throw a few bucks their way.

Thanks for reading.

ICYMI: If you are new to the Rembis Report and would like to read any of the previous issues, PLEASE CLICK HERE to access the archives. To read it from the beginning, PLEASE GET A COPY of The Rembis Report: An Observation.